The Freshman
By Terrence Cain
I’m not your average college student. I’m not 18, I’m not fresh out of high school, and I don’t live on campus. I’m 27, I graduated high school in 2001, and I live in a house that I rent from a friend of mine out in the country in the middle of cotton fields. Now I know what you’re thinking, “He must be a country boy.” No, actually I’m not. I was originally born and raised in Odessa in an urban area where you had to be careful and constantly watch your back if you didn’t want to get jumped by gang members or chased down by crazy dogs who broke out of their owner’s yards.
In 2008 I decided I needed a change of scenery and so I moved to Big Spring where a friend of mine had a room for rent. I’ve been here ever since. In 2009 I lost my job and was unable to find work, so I finally got the chance to go to college for the first time in my life. I should say this though; my parents couldn’t afford to send me to college in 2001 when I graduated high school so I was put in a vocational school where I got a certificate in computer systems software. It didn’t help me get a job. I wound up working at the newly built Target in Odessa working part time for minimum wage stocking shelves, only having enough money to put gas in my car to get to work and being stuck living with my parents.
I worked odd jobs and struggled to pay bills for eight long years of my life, hating job after job because it was not what I wanted to do. I wanted to go to college, a real college, but I was having a hard time finding ways to do it while still working. Not to mention that I’ve never really felt like I was smart enough to be in college because without help I’ve never been any good in math, which is something everyone has to take in college. So that fear, coupled with working all the time kept me from going to college for most of my twenties.
Then in 2009 I was let go from my latest odd job and was dealt a real hard blow. I tried for months to find work, and I simply could not. I must have applied to at least two hundred different companies in Big Spring and all of the surrounding areas and I got maybe three interviews and no offers to hire. Then seven months after I lost my job my car was repossessed because I got behind in payments. That’s when I said to myself that it was time for a change. I needed a degree and I needed it in a job that I know I would love because I have a talent for the position.
I’ve always had a talent for writing and communicating ideas. And for a brief period I wrote articles about bands that were up and coming and even an album review on the latest release by Iggy Pop for an online British music magazine called the Rock Scene, which I did for free to see if I had talent for writing or not. So now here I am in college at Howard working on getting my basic associates degree that will help me to go on to the University of Texas in Austin, if my grades and a bit of luck permit it, to get my bachelor’s degree in print journalism.
I must say, this first semester has definitely been a test for me just within its self. I was taking three classes a day, four days out of the week. I had tons of homework from each class. I was studying like crazy to pass every test, and then studying even harder for the finals. It has been very taxing on the mind and body indeed. I was also staying up till three in the morning on some days, to only have to get up again at six to get ready for school again, because I was studying or doing homework. It has just been a crazy burden I placed upon myself in my first semester at Howard College.
I don’t want to sound like a complainer about my first semester because I’m not meaning it that way. I enjoyed all of my classes, I enjoyed doing the work for each class, and I learned a lot from my classes and also about myself and my limitations. I learned that I am not as unintelligent as I thought I was. I made a B average in my math class with Professor Amber Buske for this semester and that I consider my highest accomplishment because I’ve never been good at math.
The hardest class was with US History with Professor Tommy Tune. Now don’t take this wrong, it wasn’t Professor Tune who made it hard. It was having three classes a day with all the homework for each class every day that caused a problem for me with US History, plus the fact that you have almost too much information to try and remember for the first history class. I think the US History classes should be broken up into smaller pieces. Studying from the migration of human civilization to the Americas to the Civil War is a bit much. The first class should honestly have stopped either around the time of the Puritans or just before the start of the American Revolution, with the American Revolution to about World War II being the stopping point of the second semester, then the 1950s to 2010 for a third. I know others won’t agree with that, particularly Professor Tune, but that’s just how I feel.
I think my favorite class for the first semester was definitely with Professor Adrian Calvio. His class, Introduction to Sociology, was very unique and creative. He was always entertaining and a lot of fun to learn from. I also learned a lot about societies around the world and the various cultures that we may or may not ever interact with. If there were more Professors like Adrian Calvio I think more students would stick around and not just drop out of sight.
I know personally myself that there were many times where I thought to myself, “What have I gotten myself into?! I can’t do this! This is all too much, man!” Which, honestly, was all just nonsense creeping into my mind; I just had to learn the hard way to not overdo it in the future. I will definitely try to keep from taking so many classes in future semesters. In my second semester, starting January 18th, I will only be taking five classes to see where that leads me. If need be, I will take only four in my third.
This is my advice to all of you who felt overwhelmed yourselves. If you’re thinking of dropping out of college, DON’T!!! Trust me, you will thank yourself for sticking it out when you’re in your thirties and forties, married, and with children (if that’s what you wish to have in your lives) because when you’re that old you’re going to need a really good paying job and having a degree is definitely key to having a good paying job. If you give up now you’re going to be stuck in dead end jobs for the rest of your life like I was for many years, trying to pay your bills and living from paycheck to paycheck. It’s not fun constantly worrying if you will be able to pay all your bills each month because you don’t make enough money at work.
The economy is extremely rough right now, and the only jobs really out there are ones where you need a degree in that profession to do so. So when you feel like letting go of your dreams, don’t let go, just keep holding on to your dreams and press forward through all the muck and the mud that comes your way because being in college isn’t forever and having a degree in the field you want to be in is extremely important to have so that you can live the kind of life you dream of.
I also want you to all know that if you need someone to talk to, feel free to leave comments here and I will talk to you as candidly as I can. Thanks for reading this first of many posts. Expect at least one a week, maybe more if I get the chance. I hope everyone has a great month off from school and has a very merry Christmas, or whatever holiday you celebrate, and a great time ringing in the New Year. Be safe, stay out of trouble, and take care of yourselves.
Peace - Terrence
